Zero is the Hero  

"a shock novel, at last" - Redland Rose 

"theme and variation on a scream" - X Y Zebra 

"more vibes than a live show" - Vibe Tribe


  the book
   176 pgs
  paperbound
 0-915090-99-6
 $7
buy now



audio
in progress
release tba
$21




Chapter One   No door. Fuck out of luck again. The landlord stands around measuring his dick. His tape's not small enough. He thinks he's saving money, screwing up the hinges himself, but the frame's still sitting in the hallway. For six weeks now, his tools rust, collect black dust. Bitch? Bitch not. The bastard swears he'll delay an extra day every time I complain. But it's six weeks and I still don't have a fucking door! Why can't I insist on my privacy? The resident freaks in the warehouse get even weirder gaping at me, through the gap in the hall wall. I should not be here. I could be traveling, checking in on my sisters. But the rent's right. And two long winks got me into a lease, without a credit check. But the place is still a construction site, inside and out. And I'm nowhere, without a door. I'm public property. Luckily I keep my instrument hidden in my mouth. I'm a screamer in a girl band, the lead screamer. You can hear me through six doors and six walls, through rugs hung on the vertical, over drums, a bass, and an over-amped guitar. The landlord wears dreadlocks. Or I'd stand his hair on end too. He's a Vietnam marine. And a musician, he says. But the vibes he gives off amputate. Really, a marching band drums under his smirk and shuffle. Yeah, after midnight twice a week, I hear reggae wailing from the rental office. It echoes over the dogshit in the hallway. Still, the man's no help. His raspy daytime barks don't carry far. His sullen Peruvian serf doesn't lift shit. Or doors. His book-keeper is half-deaf also. I need a strategy, don't I?

© 1999, 2010 Violet Headmess


The Sequel: Third Naked Virgin is now available.

Other novels in the Pseudonymous Series-tm

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